Thursday, November 4, on my Blog Talk Radio Show I had a great conversation with Peter Block, consultant, author and citizen. He has written several books and his latest, The Abundant Community is about empowering neighborhoods. If you want to change the world by changing our conversations, listen to this enlightening interview with Peter Block.
What’s “The Middle Way” and Who am I?
This morning I took an early walk in Sharon Woods with a friend I met at a networking event. He wanted to share some ideas about future projects and ideas that he and I are both interested in-community, healing, organizational and personal development, change, and targeting the nursing profession. We had a great walk and talk and may collaborate in the future.
Before we departed, I said one way to stay connected is my newsletter/blog and I asked him if he subscribes? He said he had not had a chance to subscribe since I updated to Feedblitz. He also said, “You know, I am still not sure what Promoting Health: The Middle Way is all about.
That made me think that many of you may be wondering the same thing. Although I am multifaceted and ever evolving, I thought I would share my "About" page of my website.
Although this is post is about me. My purpose is to be helpful to YOU. I welcome your questions, comments, and feedback.
My name is Mary Claybon, owner of Promoting Health: The Middle Way LLC, a business dedicated to deep health and wellness. My background is nursing and health education. After directing a health promotion program for 3500 employees I went on to get my Masters in Health Education. I have also been a Staff Development Specialist and Professional Speaker. I have been a yoga and fitness instructor, taught meditation and stress management in addition to clinical and nursing education. I currently offer telephone and web based coaching in the areas of stress, nutrition, fitness, health and life. I love it because it is a career that uses all of my nursing, wellness and life skills and experiences to help people change and attain their life vision and goals.I live in Cincinnati, Ohio with my husband of 35 years. Together we have three grown children, a wonderful son and daugher-in-law and two granddaughters.
What do you think you most have to offer your clients in the area of health and wellness?
Deep understandings of what it means to be human, confused, stressed and then look out at world and know you want to change but it’s difficult. Compassion, excitement and inspiration. My work is all based on my education and my own journey.
Why do you stress “deep healing??”
We think of healing as feeling better mentally or physically and so we look for a quick solution or exciting solution but it goes deeper. We hold on to negative thoughts and behaviors because of the pain in our hearts and souls. In coaching, we listen mindfully and help you come up with answers you already know and have deep inside. We don’t tell you what to do, we get to what you really want to do. We help you clear away what has gotten in the way to prevent you from being the person you want to be.
What have you learned about motivation and change in your 34 years of experience in this field?
That it has to come from the inside not “you should and here’s how” or even “I should because…”. It has to be “I will and I must because it really matters to me.”
How does wellness coaching differ from life coaching?
We do both but begin with looking at health and wellness. Our assessment includes questions on physical health history and lifestyle issues that affect health and promote or inhibit wellness. We are trained to ask open ended questions and listen mindfully, and promote inner motivation and can help with relationships, career, etc. but we always include physical and mental health – fitness, nutrition, weight management, stress management and then add life issues.
Why did you call your business Promoting Health: The Middle Way-What is the Middle Way?
The Middle Way is actually a Buddhist philosophy of balance because the Buddha learned that he could not heal the world by leaving it but by living in it with compassion and detachment. I have done everything to extremes only to realize that the path to health and healing is moderation and balance-not perfection.
What changes have you made in your own life?
I am changing all the time. My body, and with menopause it is changing on its own. My mind, less and less judgments and know everything ness. Although I am perceived as an expert I am learning all the time and love listening to others figure it out. Understand stress so much more – no drugs just relax, retreat, meditate, yoga- My spirit- broader understanding of God and the universe- more spiritual less religious –Teach A Course in Miracles.
Initially when I was younger I didn’t see things so deeply. I changed my physical lifestyle by exercising, eating healthy and quitting smoking. Later I became more interested in how I did that long term and it had to do with what I believed about life and health. Now my changes are more about healing emotionally and spiritually without it being a cliché.
What changes in our current health care system do you see as necessary and how do you see these changes being implemented?
All players communicating and wanting to heal the system so we can truly heal people and the world. More understanding of deeper healing and wellness. More teaching about long term change. The healers working on their own healing – recognizing we are all on a journey together and nobody’s physically or mentally perfect. Spiritually yes!!
Two key points to leave you with:
• Health goes much deeper than how you look or how long you live-you can be healthy on your death bed.
• You change what you deeply desire to change. Motivation must come from an intrinsic desire to change and not an extrinsic source.
This photo was taken in Petra, Jordan. It is the camel pose next to a camel.
by Mary Claybon
Some people these days would say a
molehill is a big deal. After all these little pointed mice like creatures can
tunnel through our yards and mess up our flower beds in no time. And mountains?
They are there to enjoy, to climb, to offer slopes for skiing and hiking
trails. Yet the saying, make a mountain out of a molehill implies that we are
making a big deal out of a small issue.
Molehills are upsetting and yet in
the long haul, with a big picture view they are not a disaster. Brain tumors
and terminal cancer are a big deal and like mountains are a journey not easy to
climb. Given the choice of being in pain, losing a limb or loved one, fighting
cancer, or our house burning down, we would all choose the molehills.
How often do you notice yourself
freaking out over day to day inconveniences or small things that just don’t go
according to plan? Recently my husband
and I created a rock fountain in our back yard. Four hundred pounds of rocks
later and at least three arguments, we finally finished our masterpiece. We
were so proud, took pictures and apologized for our unkind words to each other.
The results were a beautiful flow of water around the rocks. Two hours later we
noticed the flow had decreased and the water was leaking somewhere under the
rocks. It was disappointing and disturbed both of out sleep that week. Our
stress increased and our peace of mind was lost-all over a simple garden
project. The truth is we made it a mountain-something to climb and achieve and
could not handle its imperfection.
If that same weekend one of us was
diagnosed with cancer, we would have loved to struggle with a fountain rather
than begin the struggle with this disease.
Next time you get upset, stop and
remind yourself that you have two arms, two legs, you can walk and as far as
you know you still have a lot of life left to live unless you kill yourself
with stressful thoughts.
Most problems have a solution and
those that don’t are a waste of time fretting about. Stay in the moment and
focus on what is really bothering you. Did you ever notice that a stubbed toe
hurts a lot worse when you’re in a bad mood? How much time have you wasted
lately being upset about something that was no big deal?
I am amazed at how some people who
are paralyzed or are faced with big problems can take life in stride and
maintain their sense of joy, while people without these obstacles are never
There is a value in keeping a
gratitude journal. Write down everything you have and are grateful for
everyday, so that when you freak out over trivialities you can be reminded that
you are already at the top of your own mountain from where molehills don’t look
is a life and wellness coach with over 30 years of experience in health and
wellness. Through her business Promoting Health: The Middle Way LLC, Mary has
facilitated wellness programs for businesses and individuals and now offers
telephone and web based coaching nationally to promote lasting change. Mary
also facilitates A Course in Miracles group in Cincinnati, Ohio.
or call Mary at 513-309-8377. Mary’s e-mail is firstname.lastname@example.org.
PS-I wrote this article last year for a holistic publication. Today, my husband and I took the rock fountain apart and are filling it in with dirt. It was too much maintenance. We are repurposing the rocks and filling it all in with dirt and plants. We haven't had a fight yet. I hope you enjoyed the article.