by Mary Claybon | Jul 13, 2022 | Health and Wellness, The Middle Way Blog |
“The friend who can be silent with us in a moment of despair or confusion, who can stay with us in an hour of grief and bereavement, who can tolerate not knowing…not healing, not curing…that is a friend who cares.”
-Henri Nouwen
Friendship is an art. We are born into families but we must cultivate our friends. A true friend is priceless- someone you can call when you are confused, have a problem, or when you are excited and want to celebrate. Sometimes we need a friend to listen and not fix our problems or advise us with the best solution. Yet, how many people have someone in their life who will listen and love unconditionally without an ulterior motive; without asking for anything in return; someone whose own spirit is lifted by allowing you to share your dreams, worries, fears, confusion, anger, and other emotions.
This is rare in today’s society because we are in a hurry and listening takes time. It is also difficult these days because much of our communication is lost in texting, e-mail, facebook, and lack of self-awareness and mindfulness. How can we understand what someone else is feeling if we never take the time to understand our own inner world? Make friends with yourself first and you will be able to open your heart to others.
Like doctors, we want to give our friend a solution. Often we don’t want a solution; we just want to talk it out. A true healer will listen until they don’t exist so the other person can come up with their own solution, but this takes time.
There was a time when I went to a doctor and I said to him, “You know, Doctor, I think there is an emotional component to this and I really want to heal at a deeper level.” He looked at me with a sense of helplessness, and said, “Well, get up on the table and let me listen to your heart.” After putting the cold stethoscope on my chest, he proclaimed, “You are just fine.” Isn’t that funny? Would he really take the time to listen to my heart and soul and mind? No, not because he doesn’t want to, but because he doesn’t have time. Listening to someone’s feelings and emotions is difficult. We quickly want to solve the problem, hurry the pain away, and heal the person. We can’t expect our doctors to be our friends, but if we had more friends we might not need as many doctors.
You may have a “ton of friends,” but how many of your friendships are open and unreserved allowing you both to expose your soul and unleash your feelings and emotions without fear. You are fortunate if among the multitudes of people you know, you have one or two trusting friends who will be there for you even when they don’t understand you.
Cultivating friendship takes time and thought and the ability to give and to forgive. It is the desire to want to be in a relationship with another human being for no other reason than the healing energy of knowing you can count on that person and they can count on you in life when it is challenging or when it is exciting. This kind of friendship is the best medicine.
by Mary Claybon | Nov 27, 2010 | Health and Wellness |
Flaxseed is an ancient food that has been known for its health benefits for centuries. In nature it is a small blue flower with a small brown or golden seed. You can buy the whole seeds at most grocery and health food stores. It is best to buy organic whole flaxseed and grind it yourself. A small electric coffee grinder works best.
The seeds are also compressed into flaxseed oil that has some of the benefits of the actual seeds. The oil has a lubricating effect on the skin and cells, but lacks the fiber that is most helpful in the diet.
You can add ground flaxseed to most of your favorite foods without it affecting the taste. “Sneak” it in and add the healthful benefit to your favorite foods. Generally add 1 tablespoon per serving in your favorite recipes. Flaxseed has a mild nutty flavor if you taste it at all.
The suggested use is to add 1 to 2 tablespoons of ground flaxseed per day for anyone except pregnant and lactating women. Please consult your health care provider regarding use of flaxseed as a supplement in your diet.
You can add ground flaxseed to most of your favorite foods without it affecting the taste. “Sneak” it in and add the healthful benefit to your favorite foods. Generally add 1 tablespoon per serving in your favorite recipes. Flaxseed has a mild nutty flavor if you taste it at all.
The latest research is providing more and more evidence that flaxseed has many health benefits. Here is a list of possible benefits to using flaxseed in your diet.
Flaxseed:
Is a rich source of omega fatty acids and lignans along with vitamins and phytonutrients, not to mention a great source of fiber.
Has both soluble and insoluble fiber. You can’t get better than that.
Is a rich source of antioxidants and can support the immune system.
May have a protective effect against cancer, particularly breast cancer, prostate cancer, and colon cancer.
Can reduce inflammation in the colon, which can reduce the symptoms of inflammatory bowel disease.
May reduce breast pain.
May help the healing process in lung injuries.
In animal studies the ALA in flax seed inhibited tumor incidence and growth.
Has anti-inflammatory benefits that can prevent the effects of heart disease, Parkinson’s disease, asthma, arthritis and skin disorders like eczema.
May normalize heartbeat.
May prevent hardening of the arteries.
May help your cholesterol levels by decreasing your LDL (the “bad” cholesterol) levels.
May improve blood sugar levels for diabetics and because of this may also help stabilize weight.
Has an effect on hormone levels and may normalize the menstrual cycle in younger women.
May reduce hot flashes in menopausal women.
May lower blood pressure.
Can increase energy and vitality.
May help with Attention Deficit Disorder.
Resources:
Web MD discussed benefits of flaxseed
National Institute of Health on Flaxseed
http://www.niehs.nih.gov/research/supported/sep/2008/improves.cfm
by Mary Claybon | Oct 3, 2010 | Uncategorized |
Even if you are years away from retirement, you still need to think about this important time of your life. Recently I did two Middle Way Health Radio Shows about retirement.
Click Here to Listen
Al Spector and Keith Lawrence, both retired from Proctor and Gamble, discuss their 10 secrets to a fulfilling retirement in their book Your Retirement Quest.
Click Here to Listen
Dr. Richard Wendel, retired physician discusses how he left 31 years of medical practice as a urologist, earned an MBA, continue to work in a variety of fields and now enjoys retirement as a writer and volunteer. His book is Retire With a Mission: Planning and Purpose for the Second Half of Life.
The authors and I welcome your feedback and questions.
