As a life and wellness coach, spiritual advisor, and simply as a friend, I have given lots of pep talks. And there are times when I need a good pepping up myself.
I always say, I teach what I want to learn. And I learn from everyone.
Everybody needs pep talk sometimes. We all get down on ourselves, have upsets with life, and generally as normal human functioning human beings, lose our sense of motivation and energy. That’s when like all people on a playing field, we need a good Pep talk.
So here goes:
>You are doing great even if you feel like you are faltering. You are doing your best. Reward yourself for functioning at all. Sometimes in these dark winter months, we feel like a blob. Half the day may go by and your still in your pajamas-that’s okay sometimes. We all need a day to do nothing but wake up and breathe. If you give yourself a pajama day without guilt, you may feel a burst of energy and productivity the next day or week.
>Be grateful! When you are stressed it is always good to take 10 deep breaths or even 3 if that’s all your mind can focus on, but if not then think of at least three things you are grateful for right now!!
>Life will present plenty of opportunities for you to be negative. How about looking for something to shift your mind to a more positive view point even if it feels or looks like sh_t. You know the story of the little boy who said he smelled something-it was horse manure and rather than say yuk! He said there must be a pony around here somewhere.
>Quit over thinking everything. It all may be good and there you go trying to figure out what could be wrong. The ego analyzes. The spirit accepts. Stay in the moment and enjoy it. If something feels off, listen all around you to see if there is anything you need to do about it or learn from it.
>Tame your inner critic and listen to your inner cheerleader. We all have an inner critic, but we also have an inner voice that guides you to living a life that flows. One of my favorite cheers was:
Jumpin in the grandstand, beatin on a tin can, Who can? We can? Nobody else can! Standing on our hands, standin on our feet, the Rockets the Rockets can’t be beat!
Well try that one in the morning when you wake up less than excited about your day.
I tell my grandkids-Can’t died in the cornfield. YOU CAN!
And here is a pep talk from a young man aspiring to be president:
I just finished my holiday cards so naturally rather than Happy Holidays, I wished everyone a “Happy New Year.” As I was saying it or writing it this year, I thought more about the words and wondered, what does that really mean?
Who can predict what a year will be. Does that mean there will be no sadness, no grief, and no loss? I know this past year was hard for many of our friends and acquaintances. One of our best friends had heart surgery. Another friend lost her husband only 6 weeks after being diagnosed with cancer and then her mother died just a week after her husband’s funeral. We know several people who lost their jobs and many who lost their health insurance. The government shut down didn’t help 2013 very much and although Obama had the best intentions, 2014 will still be a struggle for many.
So does that mean all those people did not have a Happy 2013? What does happiness mean anyway? Certainly we will all have something go wrong this year, but I bet a lot more will go right. So when I say Happy New Year, I remind myself to find the happy throughout the year. To me happy means being mindful of what I am feeling and experiencing. Even if it’s sad or anxiety provoking, I can still find peace by allowing myself the space to feel without judging it as unhappy or bad.
Thich Nhat Hanh says, “ You have 24 hours to live. Don’t waist your time.” He teaches that in 24 hours we breathe several times a minute, we notice all kinds of things; we experience our experiences if we are mindful.
For me I am happy when I take the time to practice meditation and mindfulness regardless of what is happening good or bad. If we get too excited about something good we will certainly be disappointed when things don’t turn out quite as we would like. If we get too down when things are bad, we may not notice all that we do have and how fortunate we are in so many ways.
So if I wish you a Happy New Year, take it to mean, notice every moment or as many moments as you can this year. Let go of judging and simply be in that experience. Take a deep breath. Be grateful for that breath and then watch what is going on around you and sit with it. Be curious about it. Smile and let it be. And if things are not going so well, remember tomorrow is another day so just wish yourself a Happy New Day.
What is your vision for the rest of the year? Before you know it, we will be celebrating a new year. Are you looking too forward without enjoying the days we have left? I know this is an overwhelming time-busy with Fall cleanup, preparing for Thanksgiving, Hanukah and Christmas, business deadlines, and for many struggling with a budget or health issues. But this can also be a very peaceful time if we savor the moments right in front of us.
Let’s stop a moment and see if we can put our activities in slow motion.
Autumn is such a pretty season. The leaves certainly take their time revealing their colors and the leaves fall at their own slow and flowing pace. Sit under a tree and wait for a leave to fall in your hand. The task of raking leaves seems never ending especially if you have a large oak tree in your front yard like we do. And our red maples are almost ready to shed their glorious crimson leaves before our first snowfall. (Which came last night). Yet autumn leaves can be magical when a child jumps into a pile just raked or we feel their crispness under our feet as we walk.
In a couple of weeks, we will all be sitting down to Thanksgiving dinner. Thanksgiving is one of my favorite holidays because it is not about material gifts but rather the gift of gratitude and family blessings. December is the month of gift giving, which we do for both Hanukah and Christmas. However this year is different. The first day of Hanukah is Thanksgiving. We light the first candle the night before. This means that we will be celebrating both holidays on Thanksgiving. No problem. I will decorate sooner and perhaps have potato latkes in addition to mashed potatoes and gravy. For the grandkids we normally give a book each night of Hanukah. So this year they will get to open book with all of us after dinner.
Loved the leaves covered with snow. If you look close you can see the leaves falling.
I always enjoy the first snowfall of the year. Like the leaves, snowflakes take their time falling on the prettiest snow days, flake after flake, each a different shape and identity. Remember the song- “Here comes Suzy Snow Flake. Look at her tumbling down. Bringing Joy to every girl and boy as Suzie comes to town.” Can Suzie bring us all joy? (Full lyrics below)
Soon there will be the lights of the winter holidays as they sparkle in neighborhoods all over the world. I can’t wait-oh, I mean yes I can, but when they shine I will savor each moment of experiencing the joy of the season.
Let’s not rush through these last days of the year with anxiety. I do feel sadness when I think that stores are going to open Thanksgiving night to get a rush on holiday shopping, cutting short quality time and warm conversation.
I know there is a lot to do. I feel the anxiety too, which is why I am writing this. I want to remind myself to slow down, and take note of all I am thankful for including the fall leaves, the holiday experience, and the warmth of being with family and friends.
*Lyrics to Suzy Snowflake:
Here comes Suzy Snowflake
Dressed in a snow-white gown
Tap, tap, tappin’ at your windowpane
To tell you she’s in town.
Here comes Suzy Snowflake
Soon you will hear her say
Come out ev’ryone and play with me
I haven’t long to stay.
If you want to make a snowman
I’ll help you make it, one, two, three.
If you want to take a sleigh ride
Whee! The ride’s on me.
Here comes Suzy Snowflake
Look at her tumblin’ down
Bringing joy to ev’ry girl and boy
Suzy’s come to town.
If you want to make a snowman
I’ll help you make it, one, two, three
If you want to take a sleigh ride
Whee! The ride’s on me.
Here comes Suzy Snowflake
Look at her tumblin’ down
Bringing joy to ev’ry girl and boy
Suzy’s come to town.
A bunny on matzo, Buddha, A Course in Miracles, The Santa Cruz Haggadah and Mother Teresa.
Passover/ Easter 2013
I always feel a little lost on Easter Sunday. Growing up in a Catholic home we celebrated the entire season of Lent all the way to the special day of Easter.
Our rituals began with getting ashes on Ash Wednesday and then coming up with a sacrifice for the season of Lent. “What are you giving up for Lent?”
Chocolate or candy was a frequent choice. I don’t remember coming up with anything too deep like giving up holding grievances or judging others.
If you do nothing else for your health-Buy a PEDOMETER. Make it a goal to get 10,000 steps a day. You can get the steps by simply walking, going about your daily activities, shopping, or dancing. Yes-dancing. When I have to get more steps in my day, I will put on my favorite music or television show and dance around my family room. I might also add some running in place, marching, side steps or fast walking around the house. You would be amazed at how steps accumulate just from moving. You would also be amazed at how few steps you get if you are not focused on moving. When I work at the office, if I don't take a lunch hour walk ( I usually go out for 30 minutes) I would only get 1500 steps in a day. Those lunch time walks give me an additional 4000 or more steps.
# 2
EAT BREAKFAST. Research has shown that people who skip breakfast pack in more calories throughout the day. By starting your day with breakfast you are telling your body it is going to be well fed throughout the day and you needn’t binge at points of hunger. A great breakfast is fresh fruit especially berries, high fiber low sugar cereal, live cultured plain yogurt and a cup of coffee or tea. A few times a week you may want to add an egg for additional protein. That’s great on days you are working out at the gym or getting heavy-duty exercise. We usually have fruit and cereal for breakfast. I also make smoothies in my vitamix with whole grapefruit other fruits and on days when I feel a little punky I may add a packet or two of Emergen C.
